» "It's not a lie, if you believe it" - George Costanza

» "Hoochie mama!" - Cosmo Kramer

» "Sex, that’s meaningless, I can understand that, but dinner; that’s heavy. That’s like an hour" - Jerry Seinfeld

» "You need a priest to get rid of this" - Jerry Seinfeld

» "This was supposed to be the summer of George!" - George Costanza

» "Why should I hire you to be my latex salesman?" - Jerry Seinfeld

» "Are you still master of your domain?" - Cosmo Kramer

» "These pretzels are making me thirsty!" - George Costanza

» "Stop freaking me out" - Elaine Benes

» "Giddy-Up!" - Cosmo Kramer

» "The sea was angry that day my friends, like an old man trying to send back soup in a deli" - George Costanza

» "Jerry's under a lot of pressure. It's hard being a standup comic- sometimes they don't laugh" - Elaine Benes

» "Pity's very underrated. I like pity. It's good" - George Costanza

» "Ask not what I can do for you. Ask what you can do for me" - Jerry Seinfeld

» "You are way past the phone call break up stage" - Elaine Benes

» "If you look annoyed all the time, people think you're busy" - George Costanza

» "My name is George, I’m unemployed and I live at my parents" - George Costanza

·» "I work at Vandelay industries" - George Costanza

» "To the idiotmobile" - Jerry Seinfeld

» "I am Art Vandelay, I am an Importer/Exporter" - George Costanza

» "You're an anti-dentite" - Cosmo Kramer

» "I am speechless: I have no speech" - Jerry Seinfeld

» "I am speechless: I am without speech" - Elaine Benes

» "You stupid, stubborn, silly man" - Cosmo Kramer

» "I am freaking out! I am freaking out" - Jerry Seinfeld

» "TCB, You know: Taking care of business" - Cosmo Kramer

» "A George divided against itself, cannot stand" - George Costanza

» "You’re killing independent George" - George Costanza

» "Yada yada yada" - Elaine Benes

» "Every time I think I’m out, they pull me back in" - George Costanza

» "Now you listen to me: I want details and I want them right now. I don’t have job , I have no place to go… you’re not in the mood: well you get in the mood" - George Costanza

» "Hi it’s George, I’ve got nothing to say" - George Costanza

» "George is getting upset" - George Costanza

» "But, but I’m disturbed…I’m depressed…I’m inadequate: I
got it all" - George Costanza

» "No one’s bigger idiot than me" - George Costanza

» "I was in the pool, I was in the pool" - George Costanza

» "I’d like to have a kid…of course you have to have a date
first" - George Costanza

» "I know less about women than anyone in the world" - George Costanza

» "I always get the feeling that when lesbians are looking at me they’re thinking, that’s why I’m not a heterosexual" - George Costanza

» "I think I can sum up the show for you with one word; Nothing" - George Costanza

» "Every decision I have ever made in my entire life, has been wrong. My life is the complete opposite of everything I wanted to be. Every instinct I have, in every aspect of life, is it something to wear, something to eat, it’s all been wrong" - George Costanza

» "Yeah, I’m a great quitter: it’s one of the few things I do well… I come from a long line of quitters. My father was a quitter, my grandfather was a quitter… I was raised to give up" - George Costanza

» "I’m losing it" - George Costanza

» "My boys can swim" - George Costanza

» "Hello Newman" - Jerry Seinfeld

» "Hello Jerry" - Newman

» "No soup for you" - Soup Nazi

» "Well, lets start the insanity" - Cosmo Kramer

» "Yo-Yo Ma" - Cosmo Kramer

» "Get out!" - Elaine Benes

» "You’re bad man , you’re very very bad man" - Babu

» "You can stuff your sorrys in a sack, mister" - George Costanza

» "Not that there's anything wrong with that" - Jerry Seinfeld

Got any more seinfeld quotes? or found any errors? please email me